Is Oedipus responsible for his fate? What is he responsible for? Should we blame him?
Ah, the "fate-vs-free will" question. High school English teachers usually get this wrong. Oedipus absolutely has free will. In Greek myth, prophecies exist to come true.This fact does not, however, preclude Oedipus’ own agency in his (and others’) ruin. Apollo (the god of prophecy) knows what will happen; he does not make them happen.
Ah, comes the objection, but without Apollo's prophecy Oedipus would have lived footloose and fancy-free in Corinth for the rest of his life. But the Delphic Oracle wasn’t a door-to-door enterprise. Oedipus went to them. Some random drunk questioned his parentage. Now, Polybus and Merope could have done a lot of people a big favor by leveling with their adoptive son, but they were more interested in protecting the line of succession at Corinth. They tell Oedipus to let it go, but he just has to know the truth — his very name is suggestive of knowledge. (Gr. oida = “I know”.)
Oedipus tells Jocasta that the Oracle did not answer his question, but instead told him that he would kill his father and marry his mother. Wrong! The Oracle did answer his question — You’re going to kill a man who turns out to be your father and marry a woman who turns out to be your mother. Learning this new piece of information, Oedipus makes the further mistake of treating as certain (Polybus and Merope are his birth parents) the very idea that had filled him with such doubt in the first place.
Because he chose to consult the Oracle, and because he misinterpreted the prophecy, Oedipus inadvertently achieves the opposite of what he intended. We find the story of Oedipus so compelling because it shows us a good man trying to do the right thing with spectacularly disastrous results.
I would argue that Oedipus is not responsible for his fate. It is decreed by the oracle at Delphi that he would kill his father and marry his mother. Although the people around him go to great lengths to make sure the prophecy wouldn't come true, it nevertheless does, because, as the play illustrates, one's fate is predetermined and can't be beaten.
Oedipus does not know the man he murders on the road is his father. He also does not know Jocasta is his mother when he marries her. He therefore does not knowingly murder his father or wed his mother, and so shouldn't be held responsible. In fact, when he hears the prophecy, he leaves Corinth to avoid his horrible fate, not expecting it to meet him on the road.
Oedipus is responsible, however, for having too much pride, or hubris. Whether or not one of the men he kills in the carriage is his father, he shouldn't have killed the people in the carriage in the first place. It is excessive and unwarranted to murder them merely because his pride is injured by their running him off the road. Oedipus is also guilty of having too much pride to even imagine he could be the cause of the plague visiting Thebes. He is wrong too to mock Tiresias for being blind, when he himself is blind to his own flaws.
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